Awkwardness

It has come to my attention that I may be slightly aWkwArd.

The other day I was skype-chatting with a few of my friends in a giant group chat. The conversation quickly turned towards music. Namely the really cool old school stuff that I know next to nothing about.

        

Naturally, I felt a bit out of place.

Here were all (and by all I mean two) these people who know a lot of music and are naming four bands per second and I am sitting here watching it happen while not really knowing what in the heck we (they) are talking about. It was extremely... awkward.

So, after someone else said, "OH YEAH. I GREW UP WITH THEM," I decided to say, "I grew up with theme songs. Mostly Pokemon," before the other person could be all, "Blah blah I listen to cool music blah blah blah LED ZEPPELIN!"

Try to imagine, you are having a nice, deep conversation about music with a friend and all of a sudden this bumbling idiot comes out of nowhere to say something weird. What would you say?

They said nothing.

Just kept right on talking, and I felt pretty inadequate. I was simply ignored.

I really have many more examples of my crippling awkwardness, such as the time when my cousin was skyping her best friend who lives in Utah.

I was sitting there, minding my own business, when BAM! I noticed that I was on camera and there was another voice in my room, one that did not belong there. Oh! It was just her. Cool! Hi! But then, as she and my cousin's skype chat went on, I became aware of the fact that I was visible in the video camera.

So there I was, lurking in the background, now listening to their conversation. I couldn't have turned my attention somewhere else if I was offered a million dollars to do so. I was completely focused on the fact that I was now creeping in on their conversation.

I wanted to make the situation a bit more bearable for me.

But of course I just make things worse.

If only I could go back in time, and just kept my mouth shut, then we could've avoided my inner catastrophe. But no. No, I have to make weird small talk. To which, they were both very polite, but I could tell they wanted to be left alone.

                  

I started to talk a bit more, interrupting their every sentence. Eventually I took to going downstairs for little bits at a time, to find something to eat or occupy myself with. Alas, I could never find anything satisfying, so I had to head on back upstairs. To the skype call.

I spent the rest of the talk awkwardly interjecting at inappropriate times, and eventually, my cousin's friend (also my friend.. I hope. If she doesn't hate me after this) called me out on it.

I felt as if I needed to do a little walk of shame, but decided that that would be weird and unnecessary. So instead I opted for the awkward "head hang."

It was the opposite of successful. Like most of my endeavors.

I don't really have an appropriate ending for this post.